Maybe I should just copy some of the previous review here :) It was great again. Even in size, 250 people. On the last day I was still seeing new faces. Maybe this is normal, but not for me. I was used to hypnosis classes with 30-50 people or less.
One thing that I can expect is that I will get something very precious out of it. That's why I keep coming back. There might also be a bit of wanting security, as I invest in what I know will bring me return in the direction I am intending to go.
On the first day someone already saw through some (or all, who knows?) of the identification. That was fast! And that is some of what I expect and always get, just haven't seen that on the first day yet. No limitations, I guess. And that is, by itself, the meaning of the retreat, The Final Step. To be able to disidentify more and more with what we are not.
Lester described his flow towards Freedom where you "See it", mind goes quiet, mind comes back (less of it, but you haven't annihilated it yet), then "See it" again, mind goes quiet again, mind comes back again (but even less), each time "scorching" some more of the mind until it is completely "annihilated".Each time I go through one of Larry's retreats (any one of them, really) is like going through one of those cycles described by Lester, but on a very fast paced and more powerful way. Efficiency is the word that best describes it, and that's why I keep going. I am not is a hurry.
I intend to be an instructor someday, a long-term thing. Only if it is completely effortless. And I got a "Staff" badge this time as I help them with their products during retreats. I do that as a "giving without wanting anything in return thing" that Hale recommends we practice during retreats in his recordings. I don't get any money or anything, and it helps me with the givingness part. Then came the other side.
One great benefit of attending these retreats is having about 10 instructors there to help you one-on-one whenever needed. So last retreat I went to one and worked on the "receiving" part also. Givingness is fine, actually, now receiving is the thing. And releasing with the instructor I could take care of it easily. And it is a gain for me to get the staff badge because it points towards the goal. The only thing is that the less attached I get, the faster it seems to be moving.
Something new on this retreats was that we worked a lot with goals. Larry and Rich are releasing this 5-days Goals retreat in November and they showed us some of what they will teach there. As we were at the Final Step, some procedures were used towards Freedom. Sure, Freedom cannot be a goal. Making it into a goal puts it "there", automatically making us look away from where it is. But we can use it to bring up fears and limitations towards Freedom and release them. And we have to get some of the earthly goodies too on the way. Half-way through the processes I would forget what goals I was working with, which means it might have been working.
We worked a lot on fear. Larry has this new way to release on I can'ts in order to bring up fear and I finally got it! It is on the recorded calls if you want to hear. You get the "I can't", turn it into "I won't" (responsibility) and release from there. I had it written down and didn't use until I really experienced it during the retreat, so it is better if you listen to the call and experience it than to read it here. The words sound the same. The difference is in the experience.
The calls are here:
For the first time I had some very visual experiences. On the last exercise, about Separation and Oneness, I saw everything becoming patterns of light and shadows and experienced great peace. My mind was doing some kind of narration from the back of my head about what was happening, but I wasn't really listening.
Same amount of retreat as always, from 08:30 for optional cleanup, 09:00 it begins and goes until 12:00. Lunch with homework (it is a retreat to release!), afternoon class until 18:00. Back from dinner at 19:30 and we would go until 20:30-21:30 with optional cleanups. This is what I like, we can go on releasing the whole day non-stop, but each one does whatever he or she wants to do. The main class is 09:00 till dinner,some days after dinner. But when Larry asked if we wanted the night free a lot of us didn't and we kept going. I go for everything, so I begin at 08:30 and finish by 23:30. Then do the homework until sleep.
Finally something that really stayed with me is a deeper level of "understanding" about releasing. Not intellectual, of course, there's not much to know about it. At some point it felt like all the fragmented information I had floating around from Larry, Lester, Hale, and others all connected to each other and I "felt" and "knew" something new. That also happens all retreats, and I have this urge to go back to the basic course and do it again because "Now I get it!". Which is very good. Releasing is now easier, not only because of the insight, but also because of the momentum we get on retreats like this one. According to Lester, it is 250*250= 62500 times the releasing power for us.
This was retreat number 6 and I already bought a few more. I am having too much fun with them, and getting a lot from them. I will not release that much by myself and it is great to meet other people that are also going this way. To finish with some "Lester said", Lester said it is good meet other releasers periodically because other people will try to make the world real. That is all they can do. So focusing on Freedom from time to time with a bunch of people looking in the same direction is a good aid. "Any aid is a good aid except aids"
One thing I forgot to say: Ken Smythe. He is a great reason for me to go to the retreats. He is one of the instructors, the first one to work with Larry. Having him there, for me, is like having Larry and Hale in the same retreat. Larry is more about the first way of releasing (deciding) and Ken is about the second way (welcoming). He can just answer questions or you can tell him about your issue and he provides a cleanup for you based on that, and give tips on things to release. And he is awesome, uses a lot of metaphors and story to help us release more. I have some weird(good) reactions to his cleanups. One time I just blacked-out and when I came back, the ego was separated from me. It was my first real disidentification. Also, the first time the mind stopped completely and I could see beyond was in one of his cleanups. I sure wanted to do a weekend course with him to get his perspective.